Special Episode: 4
How to Avoid Conflict & Coparent Well in Challenging Times with JoAnne Pedro-Carroll
The Coronavirus has thrown us all for a loop, forcing us to take on multiple roles at once. Parents are struggling to work from home and homeschool our children at the same time, all while managing financial challenges and fears around the health and safety of the people we love. And divorced parents have the added pressure of coparenting in a time when our parenting plans just aren’t feasible. So, what can we do to avoid conflict with our ex and show up for our kids as the best possible version of ourselves?
Clinical psychologist Dr. JoAnne Pedro-Carroll is an internationally recognized expert in the field of children and divorce, appearing regularly as a keynote speaker at conferences around the globe. She has 35 years of clinical experience helping families navigate the transitions that accompany divorce and often serves as a child specialist in the collaborative law process. JoAnne is also the bestselling author of Putting Children First: Proven Parenting Strategies for Helping Children Thrive Through Divorce.
On this special edition of Divorce Dialogues, JoAnne joins Katherine to discuss the heightened stresses divorced parents are dealing with right now and encourage coparents who are struggling to reach out to a neutral third party. She explains why our brains tend toward fight, flight or freeze in circumstances like these and what we can do to respond rather than react—and be the kind of parent we really want to be. Listen in for JoAnne’s insight on seeing your ex as a respected colleague in the business of raising your children and learn how you can help your child build resilience and thrive through divorce AND quarantine.
The stresses divorced parents are dealing with through COVID-19
- Emotions heightened in times of uncertainty
- Overwhelmed with managing multiple roles
What to do when one parent wants to follow the parenting plan but the other is fearful
Why it’s crucial to have a safe space for thinking through your options
The value of a neutral third party to facilitate problem-solving (e.g.: family counselor)
When our brains tend toward fight, flight or freeze + why that’s not optimal for collaboration
The relationship between self-care and our ability to be the kind of parent we want to be
Why asking for help is a sign of strength rather than weakness
Protecting your child’s health vs. trying to control your ex
Renegotiating your relationship with your ex as business partners in raising children
How conflict between parents adds to a child’s anxiety, fear and worry
The two most powerful predictors of a child’s resilience in divorce
- Parents’ ability to contain conflict
- Quality of parenting itself
CONNECT WITH JOANNE PEDRO-CARROLL
CONNECT WITH KATHERINE MILLER
The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller
Call (914) 738-7765